True Flow Teams
An Olympic Mental Skills Coach Reflects on Lessons Learned and Advises on Best Practices Going Forward
July 15, 2021 | Cornelia Cannon Holden, MDiv
When a team erupts in ecstasy after playing for 60-minutes in a collective flow state, it sounds like this:
That was sick! We played with our hearts on the line! Every single one of us. We. Showed. Up! We had so much heart. So much passion. And we worked so hard for that. Today we brought it! With confidence. Total confidence! And strength. Power. Grit. We were In. The. Zone! We killed it. This was our moment and we owned it! It’s so surreal! We did it! We won!
What prepared these women to win a do-or-die game to secure a chance to play for World Championship gold depended on their psychological, emotional, spiritual, and cultural training as much as it did on their individual physical prowess. Both teams in that particular do-or-die game—the United States and Canada—were equally physically fit. And as their mental skills, team building, and leadership development coach, I was charged with developing the only two other levers you can pull to win: one is mental-emotional-spiritual. The other is cultural. We had been working on both for two years.
Unpacking their first-ever teamwide flow state after the game I knew I needed to address both the mental-emotional-spiritual aspect of what happened and the role their team culture needed to play going forward.
“There are negative consequences to pursuing flow as an ultimate goal.” I remember telling them.
“First, the allure will hook you and you will pursue it to the ends of the earth. That will cause you to lose your way.”
I paused to take a beat and make sure they were settling into the moment.
“Pursuing flow is like pursuing a false idol. There’s nothing inherently wrong with flow, in fact as you know it’s a true bliss state, but if you get addicted to it you will lose track of yourself, one another, and the real way to win. Rather than playing the moment in front of you, you will start to play for an elusive flow-state future.”
It was then that a few women sat up and pulled out their notebooks. It started to feel like we were sharing stories around a campfire, so I kept telling them the story of flow.
“Sometimes the process of winning doesn't feel anything like flow. There’s a good chance tomorrow’s game will feel scrappy, bumpy, off balance, and not-quite-right. Don’t overthink it. Play the moment, not what you think the moment should be. And whatever you do, don’t try to play for flow. Just play whatever is happening on the ice. Flow is always there, but you may or may not feel it.”
I stopped to invite comments.
A younger player spoke up. She recapped and built on what I was saying and nailed it. The team hooted and clapped. I pressed on.
“So, this is my first point: every game is a new start. A new opportunity to earn respect. A chance to bring your skills to the challenges in front of you. When tomorrow comes it will be different from today. Don’t cling to yesterday or borrow unfounded trouble from the future. Just keep showing up to the moment with intelligence, grit, and instinct. Play from there. The results will take care of themselves.”
Players were perking up. They could feel the power and purpose of this moment. Yesterday was weaving itself into today and tomorrow.
“My second point is this: Each of you will respond to the high of yesterday differently. How you respond depends on how you process information and experiences. Some of you will find yourselves trying to understand what went right. You will try to label your experience. You will try to package it for later use. Some of you won’t think too much at all about trying to label or categorize or evaluate the game, but you may feel restless, exhausted, tense, or either really sleepy or wired. Some of you may feel cranky. Or bored. What is common, though, is that you’re all coming down off of an adrenaline-enriched high. After being in the zone, it’s natural to feel lower than usual. But that’s all part of the flow journey: Don’t cling to the high. Don’t run from the low. Allow both. And no matter what you’re feeling, it’s your nervous system’s natural process of re-regulating itself.”
I remember looking around and hoping this was making sense. “Does this sound familiar to anyone?” I asked.
Different women shared what they were thinking and feeling. We were starting to normalize the ups and downs of everyone’s unique experiences. I fielded a few questions. Women laughed. A few cuddled into one another further.
“Now you can see just how critical recovery is on all levels—physical, psychological, emotional, and spiritual. This is the time to let go and let yourself rest. Give in. Take your foot off the accelerator. Give your nervous system a deep reboot.”
It was clear they were getting it. There was a palpable sense of relief in the room. I wasn’t telling them to try to get up again. To be hard driving. To be perfect. To keep being extraordinary. Instead, someone in authority had given them permission to rest. Now they could let down and hit the wall.
“So, that’s my third point: Take really good care of yourself and don’t let yesterday’s high infect your preparation today. Trust your bodies to heal. Trust your routines. Trust what you know. Tomorrow is a new day and a new game.”
I had made my points. They were letting go of the high. The crash was coming on. I sensed tomorrow was going to be a really good day.
The U.S women slept soundly. They had shown they could let go of the previous day’s epic flow state experience and relax into rest. Winning gold is never a guarantee, but their mental-emotional-spiritual and cultural preparation had set them up for success.
Saturday, April 12, 2008 in Harbin, China turned out to be a good day to be a U.S. citizen, indeed. For the first time in women’s ice hockey history, the U.S. women beat the Canadians in back-to-back games to win World Championship gold. Soon thereafter they would earn their first-ever world number one ranking.
The opening ceremonies of the 2020 Tokyo Olympics are set to take place on Friday, July 23rd under formidable circumstances. And yet athlete dreams are on the line. These young athletes cannot wait another three years. Some of their careers are peaking this very month and they are eager to test themselves against the best in the world.
What we know from flow science is that when we bring the right set of highly trained skills to a formidable challenge there’s a good chance we’ll enter the world of liquid bliss, called flow. When you do, it’s like nothing else you’ve ever experienced.
So, what are the flow lessons we can take from the the U.S. Women’s ice hockey team to apply in 2020 in Tokyo?
Practice, practice, practice, and then surrender to the moment.
Trust your instincts. They’re now well trained.
Give your whole heart. Play for your teammates and your country. Do not play from your head and do not play for yourself.
If you hit a flow state before the final competition, don’t cling. Don’t stress. Let that moment be what it was. Double down on your routine. Get deep rest. Trust what you know. And show up for the next competition.
Sometimes excellence feels bumpy, sometimes it feels like liquid grace. You can achieve optimal performance in either state. Just show up to the event, the moment, and your routine.
Choose something or someone larger than yourself to play for. Pray. And then drop in and give it absolutely everything you have. Play with no regrets.
Have fun!